*GULP* How can we say that? That’s blasphemy!
Well, sacrilegious or not, the truth is: some of us hate God. Or have hated.
An ex-colleague blurted out once she hates God. She spat out those three words in exasperation when she couldn’t make sense of her life then.
But I suspect she is one of the few who dare to verbalize their thoughts. Others just internalize those thoughts and keep them from rolling off the tip of their tongues. Like me.
A few months ago, I found myself lividly telling the Lord I hate Him–only in my head. I remember being so pissed about an unfair episode in my life that my first instinct was to yell at Him inwardly: “LORD, HOW CAN YOU LET THIS HAPPEN? I HATE YOU!”
I swear I was really angry. I just never said those words out loud.
Uttered or thought, hating God is a sin by religious standards. How dare we! We should be struck for our irreverence! Surely this is a sin that has us marked for hell!
Well surprise…nothing untoward happened to my ex-colleague or me. In fact, God caused the situation to turn around for my good in spite of my acrimonious feelings toward Him.
Does this mean we’re better off hating God? That, is not what I’m advocating.
I’ve come to realize that God allows us to be angry with Him because He has given us a free choice.
Obviously He prefers that we love Him. But He’s not gonna strike us off if we choose to hate Him. He’s definitely not gonna fall off His throne. Neither is He gonna turn around and wipe us off the face of the earth.
Why is that?
Because God doesn’t change who He is. No matter what we think or feel about Him. God is full of love. He is rich in mercy. He is overflowing with tenderness. He doesn’t bear grudge. He doesn’t keep score.
Look. When He sent His Son to die for our sins, He didn’t punish the rogues who lied about His Son. He didn’t whack the ruffians who spat at His Son. And He certainly didn’t kill the villians who asked that His innocent Son be crucified.
If He had allowed those sinners to get away with the horrid things they did to His Son, why would He get even with us just because we hate Him. An eye for an eye? Come on, that’s so NOT God!
And don’t think for a moment that He’s not affected because He disregards our feelings. Nah. God cares deeply for us. Do you know He even bothers to number the hairs on our heads?
I think God prefers that we hate Him when life doesn’t make sense instead of hating others or ourselves. He can handle our hate no matter the intensity. Actually, He can even transform that hatred into something positive…if only we allow Him. Because, He can work all things together for good.
So how do we allow Him? How do we turn to Him when we are so angry that we want to shut Him out of our lives? Who cares about prayers or His Word when we’re full of bitterness toward Him? Just get away from me already!
For starters, try chatting Him up. If you can’t speak calmly, try yelling. Or screaming. Or crying. Whatever that makes you feel better. My point is: vent your frustration on Him. Believe me: He CAN handle your rage. He CAN handle your hate.
And you know what? THAT’S having a relationship with God!
He wants you to get real and straight talk with Him. Because even if you try to pretend that everything is fine, He can read your mind. So why pretend? Let it out on God!
And this brings me to what my son did the other day—he threw a tantrum at me for something of his own doing. I was annoyed but I later realized that he vented his anger on me because we have a relationship. I’m the closest to him—He knows I love him and can deal with that momentary outburst from him. Obviously I don’t encouraged such behavior but I did forgive him rather quickly.
Likewise, I’m not encouraging anyone to hate God but if you feel bitter toward Him for whatever reason, let Him know. He’s your heavenly Father who loves you and He wants to have a relationship with you. So get straight talking with Him. He’ll understand how you feel and the best part, He knows exactly how to remove that resentment from your heart.
Trust me. He won’t turn His back on you. How many times has He told us that He will be with us or that He will never leave us nor forsake us? Just be prepared you won’t be hating Him for long after that. I won’t even be surprised if you decide to say sorry.
Because when you bare your heart to Him, He’s bound to shower it with all His tender loving care.