How To Overcome The Need For Approval And Be A Winner

Need for validation
About two weeks ago, I wrote about how hurt I was being ignored. I also mentioned I’d groused to the Lord about it. Guess what?

The very person who ignored me looked me up and initiated a conversation with me, showing concern for how I was doing.

What seemed like a random chat wasn’t random at all. I know the Lord had orchestrated the events leading to that restoration.

I cried my heart to Him and He answered me. He went before me to put events in place so that somehow, some way, this person sought me out in the most unusual way.

Of course I was thrilled about the personal attention but much as I craved for human validation, I realized that validation from the Lord is more precious and meaningful.

I can’t begin to tell you how warm my heart feels, knowing that I have a Lord who understands the pains in my heart and cares enough to restore my feelings.

Yet I also know that I’ll probably continue to seek human validation. The need might lessen over time but this desire to be recognized is not going to go away overnight.

So why do I still yearn for man’s validation when I know the Lord loves and validates me? Is His approval not good enough?

All I can say is that the need for approval and positive feedback is probably programmed into our flesh after the fall of man. Remember Adam and Eve hid from God after they realized they were naked after eating the wrong fruit? Most likely, they were afraid of being disapproved and rebuked.

I don’t believe God created us to seek validation from people. Why? Seeking validation from people will only lead to disappointment, even from those closest to us. We could end up hurt, disillusioned and confused.

But the Lord never disappoints. His love for us is steadfast and never changing.

Even if the world thinks you’re a loser, even if everyone ignores and rejects you, the Lord is telling you, “You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are my beloved. You are the apple of my eye. You are precious in my sight.”

It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes.

Friend, know that your need for validation is not going to disappear. But also know that as you hold on to God’s approval of you, you will soon find yourself strengthened and confident even when you are overlooked, disregarded and ignored.